It's whatever...really

Thoughts from a deadbeat dad...

2010-09-11T12:31:00.000-05:00

Sitting outside of my daughter's ballet class (of course, I'm the only man here) and I'm reminded of a recent argument I had with my daughter's mother. Well, I'm not sure if you could call trading messages through BBMessenger an argument...but you get the point... Anyway, most of this conversation was just pure garbage but the only thing that stuck with me was that she called me a 'Deadbeat Father'. Now what's funny about that isn't the absurdity of the comment, which we'll get to in a minute, but the fact that the comment left me absolutely speechless...and for those that know me, you know that this is a remarkable feat...

So what qualifies me as 'Deadbeat'?
* I filed for divorce, moved out, and, subsequently, have moved on with my life.
* As a condition of that divorce not only do I pay child support (which I do gladly), but I maintain mortgage payments on the house where you and my daughter live until July, 2011...basically, you get alimony.
* I spend every, alternating, weekend with my daughter.
* I take my daughter to breakfast and school one time a week...and have done so for the last two school years.
* my child support payments are applied directly to the cost of my daughter's tuition and these ballet lessons (which I'm attending, currently)...so I pay for her education and her extracurricular activities.

And yet, I'm a 'deadbeat'....
********************************
I'm a product of divorce. After my parents divorced and Moms moved us (I have a younger brother) to Houston, my father refused to pay child support for 5 years. Being the latch-key kids that we were, I remember coming home from school to no lights more than once. My mother never complained. In fact, she never said a disparaging word about our father in our presence. Between 1987-1994, we spent 2 summers and one Christmas holiday with our father in California--only because his wife sent for us. I played football in high school and college AND 5 years of semi-pro...my father has never seen me play a down. My daughter is 6....and has never met her Grandfather. Now that may be as much my fault as is his...but I digress.
*******************************
Looking at this small sampling of differences between my father and I, tell me again why I'm the deadbeat....

I've been fortunate to have fallen in love with my best friend and am looking forward to the life we'll build together. So I'm guessing. Since she (the ex-wife) still has a bit of bitterness in her system (recently snatching our daughter out of a car preventing her from attending my family reunion...all because my girlfriend was coming along....yes, a baby mama drama episode) maybe that's why I'm a 'deadbeat'. If that's the case, then to quote Redman: "I'LL BE DAT!"

And there it is....

Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

The Re-introduction...

2010-09-08T09:11:00.000-05:00

What's up....what's happ'nin...didn't realize I hadn't posted a blog in almost 3 years...damn, exactly what tha hell have I been doing in all that time? Well, plenty, actually, and maybe one day, I'll go into that.....just not today. Today, it's all about jumping back in, with both feet. So let's take it back to the top.

Allow me to re-introduce myself:
name - Fishbone (yes, named from Fishbone the Whino from Good Times)
age- 34
smoker- no
drinker- damn straight
children- one...and she's my world
interests- too many to name

I love sports, soccer and football, primarily...and in that order. I hate fairweather fans, if you have a squad, stick with them. Good times and when they suck balls. I believe in supporting my team(s) and my team(s) only. Meaning, I root for mine, and not against others...most people just hate on others' teams...not ya boy. For the record, here is where my allegiances lie:

the alma mater...yes, that's me in there

the football club--soccer for you beginners

the college football team

the NFL team

the NBA team

the MLB team

I'm a random thinker...an intelligent fool...with a very strange sense of humor. Stick around...this should be fun.

I'll be posting a bit more frequently than I used to......hell, because I forgot I had a blog.

and THERE it is.....

Been away for a minute

2007-12-04T18:14:00.000-06:00

I'm always here, just been writing more about basketball lately. I'm a big Rockets fan, and I contribute to another blog site that's all about the NBA. Two of my friends who are diehards as well (of the Bulls and Nets, respectively) also contribute...so it's a pretty good potpourri of different junk. Feel free to check us out at http://www.hysmd.blospot.com/

I've been in a funk all afternoon since reading this article. I've been a UGK fan since 1991 as a Sophomore in high school...and to hear that Pimp C passed away this morning has definitely but a damper on my day. You know, the old adage is that deaths happen in 3's. Sean Taylor was killed, senselessly, last week (R.I.P Sean) and laid to rest yesterday. Pimp C was found dead in his hotel room this morning...

In this case, I hope that old wives tale is just that...a tale.

R.I.P. Pimp C

UGK for life.

and there it is. . .

Checking in

2007-11-18T22:25:00.000-06:00

Back from the brief vacate.

There's a lot of stuff going on in the world, of course...but nothing I feel like talking about.

Oh, went to see RENT last night and it was great as it always it. A little hard for me accepting Anwar Robinson in the role of Tom Collins (my favorite character) because of his extremely high vocal register...but he did a good job.

So instead of rambling on, I'll holla back when something's on my mind.

and there it is...

Mobile blog #3

2007-11-10T11:05:00.000-06:00

I'm on vacation. Be back next week.

Mobile blog #2

2007-11-01T21:09:00.000-05:00

I think I'm gonna like this mobile blogging thing.

Can't you tell the camera on my phone is working now...

Mobile blog #1

2007-10-31T21:35:00.001-05:00

Whenever I forget I work with some "good ole boys" I find this in the office fridge.

Finally!

2007-10-30T18:30:00.000-05:00

I am proud to say that I prayed for this outcome and thankfully it has come to fruition.

10-20

2007-10-21T00:21:00.000-05:00

a long, long time ago...in a land 900 miles away there was nothing more important to me than those numbers: 10 & 20. Of course, I couldn't see anything past my face, or my immediate future, but I knew that those numbers would be with me for the rest of my life.

Fast forward to present day and while I do still remember what these numbers signify in my life, they don't hold the same meaning they once did. I might go so far to say that the next time I see those numbers (together) they'll mean even less.

*yes, I know I'm being a bit opaque. Some things I'm not sure how to say...not even with my fingers*

Maybe I've discovered some newer numbers that hold more significance. Maybe the reasons to appreciate those numbers have dissipated. Maybe I'm truly ready to get past them entirely. Maybe. Maybe not.

and there it is...

What tha hell...

2007-10-15T21:21:00.000-05:00

Clifford sees the judge tomorrow. I guess you can leave Bankhead, but Bankhead never leaves you. The irony of his arrest is that he has a minor part in the upcoming film American Gangster alongside Denzel Washington...what a terrible mistake on his part.

Uhh, O.J. looks like you're going down this time.

And this shit here...

'Canes lost, damn.
Falcons are down at the half...gotta go, game's back on.

and there it is...

Miscellaneous Shyt (a partial rant)

2007-10-08T19:27:00.000-05:00

For the first time this century I didn't go to Homecoming. Right now the trip wasn't in the best interest of the family, and I understand that and don't regret not going. But shit, that really bothered me not going. I know everyone feels something special for their alma mater, but I tell you, there's nothing like a black college homecoming! My wife has made every trip to homecoming with me since 2001 and she agrees that the homecoming experience at my alma mater is a far cry from what she knew coming from a larger state institution. My yearly trip to Atlanta serves as my HBCU recharge to get me through until the next year. Reconnecting with my boys, my teammates, the occasional chick I knew, and even my frat brothers...is something too good to miss. And I did...DAMN. Well at least we won the game!!!

I work the night shift inside an 11-person office. Everyone has a cubicle aside from the new person who just started last week. Well, apparently this new person uses my work station during the daylight hours, and prior to my arrival. I'm all for the team, so I have no problem with that...just don't disrepect my space. Well, today I arrive at work and upon entering my cubicle I find an: open water jug; a personnel folder; benefit enrollment forms; and my chair has been adjusted. WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO COMMON COURTESY!?!? Why does it seem that more and more I come across people that either have no home training, or no common fuckin sense?! You would think that if you're working at someone else's workstation, you would clean up your shit before you leave for the day. What makes this even funnier, to me of course, is that I've never met this person!!! Don't worry though, I've left her (yeah it's a woman...I could go on and on about that) a rather scathing, yet professional note for her to read in the morning.

Hurricanes lost...damn
Falcons lost again...double damn Joey Harrington played like...Joey Harrington

Oh and we (my soccer club team) won our first game of the season yesterday 3-2. We're now 1-2-1. Hell, ya gotta start somewhere!!!

and there it is...

Boo Goo Doo Boom: Video - Boondocks Season 2 Promo

2007-10-03T01:04:00.000-05:00

Boo Goo Doo Boom: Video - Boondocks Season 2 Promo

Big shouts to my boy Enigmatik over at bgdboom.blogspot.com for this one. Can't wait till next monday.

my V I C K rant

2007-09-26T00:52:00.000-05:00

These are my Michael Vick jerseys. The white one on the left I've had since 2001, the red one I purchased 2 seasons ago. As a normal football fan, I have the jersey of my favorite player from my favorite team. I know that Mike won't be playing this season, but I'm not tossing away my jerseys. In fact, once he has served his time and paid his debt to society, I, for one, am hoping to see him back on the playing field as a member of the ATLANTA FALCONS.

I was looking forward to watching the ESPN Town Hall meeting earlier this evening and I'm glad I did. Bob Ley (one of my favorite ESPN personalities) served as moderator and kept the conversation flowing and even-keeled. The panel was comprised of two former Falcon players (Terrance Mathis & Chuck Smith); one nationally syndicated Atlanta based radio host (Neal Boortz); AJC columnist Terence Moore; and Selena Roberts of the NY Times. The audience was largely, and vocally "pro-Vick" and much of their disdain was lobbied at Chuck Smith, who was the panelist most critical of Vick's crimes...but not Vick the person. Well, there was the 2 times that the representative from the Humane Society got up to speak...he was definitely not received well by the crowd. Hope he had an escort back to his ride??? But I digress...

Vick plead guilty. Regardless if it was of his own choice, or because he was backed into a corner, he did plead guilty and accepted the responsibility for his actions. Unfairly to Vick, the only name that you hear whenever this case is mentioned is his. His co-defendants are rarely, if ever, identified by any name other than 'co-defendant'...but yet, some people have the nerve to dispute the idea that Vick was the focal point of the entire investigation. Other people contend that Vick is a violent criminal and deserves the maximum punishment allowable in this case. Forgive my french but, "WTF!?" While I admire and respect the bond between man and beast, or owner and pet, more specifically, I was never for one moment disturbed nor offended by the offenses that Vick accepted responsibility for. Oh, and to answer your question: no, I do not CURRENTLY have any pets, but I have had 3 DOGS in my lifetime. I believe that a rule is a rule, and a law is a law. Vick broke the law and will accept his punishment. I hope that his sentence is on the lighter end of the guidelines. Not because I want him to return to the football field sooner than later, but I believe he'll be a greater asset to the animal-lover community outside of prison than in it. Who else could possibly serve as a greater spokesman for the Humane Society than Michael Vick...think about it? I bet they are.

To all you idiots that continue to spout off that dog fighting is a part of the hip-hop sub-culture...I'll add this personal testimony: I lived in Atlanta while in college from 1994-1998 and I was invited to, and did attend a dog fighting match. Of the approximately 55 people that were there that afternoon only 15-18 were black while the majority of the crowd was of a Caucasian nature.

To Roger Goodell (NFL Commissioner): Michael Vick will miss the 2007 season along with his salary for it, he's already lost most of his endorsement deals totaling way over $100 million along with severe damage to his reputation. Last but not least, he'll be a convicted federal felon. It would be in everyone's best interest for his NFL suspension to be concurrent with his jail sentence. Certainly, you won't be foolish to consider banning him from the league a la Pete Rose and MLB. Especially now that you've proven that your heavy-handed form of justice has its stipulations and inconsistencies with the non suspension of NE Patriots head coach Bill Belichick for his actions in "Spy Gate" which was directly involved with on-field actions. Which even had other members of the coaching community questioning your actions.

It's interesting that most of my favorite athletes are considered pariahs by, at least, a portion of society. I'm a fan of: Allen Iverson; Keyshawn Johnson; Barry Bonds; Zab Judah...and now I guess I can add Michael Vick to this list.

I wore my red Jersey the other day. Oh yeah, I got a few ugly looks, and I only went to the gas station. Imagine had I walked into a pet store or something...

and there it is...

BREAKING NEWS...

2007-09-24T05:56:00.000-05:00

Of course I could've selected something much more important than this...but that wouldn't be me.

They're Back!!!

Another Moment in African American History

2007-09-20T18:29:00.000-05:00

Powerful and peaceful...perfect. Now, will justice be served???

A little less significant...but still noteworthy: 'Ye v. Fiddy was over before it began

Did I mention Da U will smash Texas A&M tonight!

gotta go...game is on!!!

A Truly "whatever" blog

2007-09-18T20:09:00.000-05:00

Falcons lost again, and Joey Harrington played like crap...again. But, really, is Byron Leftwich going to be any better???

My soccer team lost this week 3-0. Thankfully, we didn't play as bad as the score would indicate.

Women that have a good working knowledge of football, and don't ask dumb questions are sexy as hell! Sorry, you just had to be there.

Da U will crush TAMU Thursday night in the Orange Bowl! Yeah, I said it.

O.J. has some serious issues....I have no further comment.

A few members of the hip-hop community have begun to champion the cause for the Jena 6

The new Jill Scott album is the best of her career, to date. Yeah I know it doesn't drop until next Tuesday...I can't help it if I know low people in high places.

Homecoming's in 2 weeks, and I'm not going this year. As the time approaches I'll regret this decision more and more...

Whenever this show finally comes back...it will be well worth the wait.

mind is blank now...

Forgiveness: An introspective look

2007-09-13T21:31:00.000-05:00

Someone close to me, (well, close at that time) once told me, blatantly "the reason you have so many anger issues is because you have forgiveness issuess..." Looking back on that conversation, I can't honestly say that I've ever overcome those issues. Now, I know how to let things just roll of my back, or brush them aside completely. But if ever wronged: do I; can I; and will I, truly be able to forgive?

***I wouldn't label my relationship with my Father as 'estranged'...but if there was a word for "probably 2 steps below that" I'd go with it.***

It's safe to say that I've effed up a time...or 263. Among all those occassions (believe me 263 is on the 'light' side) I know that I've caused harm...intended or not. Was I ever forgvien? Did I deserve to be? Really, how could I expect someone to forgive me for something I've done, when I'm reluctant to do it myself. Sort of an adaptation to the old adage of you can't love someone unless you love yourself first. I said 'sort of'!?

Anyway, I have a friend who's pretty miffed at me (for a good reason) and I wonder if I'll ever be forgiven. My words/actions have caused a pretty large canyon between us and I don't expect it to shrink anytime soon.

***My Father's birthday is next week. My Daughter is 3 years old. Yes, I'll send my Father a birthday card. No, my Daughter has never met her grandfather.***

Damn.

Quick shots:

Lost amidst the Fiddy v. Kanye showdown is the fact that Fiddy's joint is not only NOT better than Kanye's, nor will it outsell Kanye...it's not even the SECOND best hip-hop album released this week. That spot is filled by The Dream Merchant vol. 2 by 9th Wonder.

This story has also been on the hush hush at the University of Maryland

and there it is...

Just some Miscellaneous isht...

2007-09-12T00:20:00.000-05:00

Well let's see:

Falcons lost

Hurricanes got spanked

and the alma mater got toasted as well

to quote the great Florida Evans: "Damn, damn...damn!"

oh, and to top it all off, the most anticipated hip-hop album of the fall has been pushed back a whole month. I feel your pain Phonte...Glad I got my shirt to tide me over...

And don't let me forget this little tasty story. I damn near spit out my water when I first read this...and some people have the nerve to say that racism isn't an issue in 2007. Bulls***!

On a lighter note: My new soccer season opened with a 3-3 draw. See if you can spot me in the team pic:

I didn't see this year's VMA's, but the fight between Tommy Lee and Kid Rock over the hepatitis chick...mad funny! I'm just waiting for someone in the mainstream media to blame hip-hop for THIS one!!!

I have a different perspective on the 50 vs. Kanye first week sales competition. I just happen to know someone who works in the electronics department of my neighborhood Target. I asked him who he thinks will sell more and his response was this: "put it like this, in the inventory room, I have 3 boxes of Kanye's cd, and only 1 of Fiddy's on the shelves...and I've already emptied 2 Kanye boxes..." And in case you wanted my opinion: Graduation smacks Curtis.

and there it is...

Football season...thank GOD!!!

2007-09-07T21:03:00.000-05:00

Yes, the 2007 NFL season is finally here and as a fan of the Atlanta Falcons it is FINALLY time to concentrate on the on-field action...

well, yes and no. The 'yes' part easily equates to the focus being squarely on the team's production on the field. The 'no' part will be just as visible, unfortunately, because every time there's a situation that calls for Joey Harrington to escape the pocket or use some athleticism, and he can't...the "if Mike was still here..." murmurs will fill the dome. Either way, let's play some football. GO FALCONS!!!

oh but that's not all
Yes, I'm also a big fan of "Da U" and yes, I've been to the Orange Bowl and sat in the student section for a home game...absoulutely nuckin futs!

I will defend the Falcons and the 'Canes vigorously...so watch ya mouths around me!

Last but not least:

HBCU football is what I know best, since it's the football I played. The Alma Mater is off to an 0-2 start so far but hope is not lost and I know they'll be righting the ship very soon! C-A-U we rock the house!!!

and there it is...

Snapping back to reality

2007-09-05T19:33:00.000-05:00

"...Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back..." Those of ya'll that remember the Welcome Back Kotter theme music should've been singing along! And no, I never watched the show...but the theme song was tight!

Ahhh, back at the office after 5 days off. Back in my nice ergonomically correct chair, looking at the 2 pictures of my beautiful daughter on my desk, glimpsing at all the crap I've got tacked onto the walls of my cubicle...YO, WHO DA F*** TORE MY SOCCER SCHEDULE OFF THE WALL AND DIDN'T BOTHER PUTTING THAT S*** BACK?!?!?! "breathing" counting to 10. 1-2-3-4-5-6...WHO THE HELL CHANGED THE STATION ON MY STEREO?!?! AWW HELL NAW. Don't these white folks know that you NEVER...EVER, EVER, FA-NEVER-EVER, touch a black man's radio!?!?! Needless to say, I'm a bit pissed. Apparently the new guy here at the office uses my workstation during the day since he doesn't have a PC at his desk. Look, I'm all for the 'team concept' but RESPECT MY SHIT, SON!!! Sorry, I will normally try to censor myself (I know I'm a foul-mouthed M.F.) but when you disrespect my space...that's disrespecting me. Homey don't play dat!

Now, on to my vacation:

The fam (Wifey, daughter, brother, brother's lady, Moms) and I went to a Labor Day gathering at the home of one of Wifey's Aunts. **Side note, Wifey and I are considered the 'outcasts' by her family because we don't choose to spend EVERY holiday with them. And I've even been accused of brain washing my wife against her family. Yeah, I'm good...but I ain't THAT good.** Anyhow, to make a long story short: we were actually welcomed into the fold, for a change, and had a very enjoyable time. Thanksgiving is around the corner, let's hope for 2 in a row.

Before I go, some random thoughts:

Halle's having a baby...with a white boy. Why am I NOT surprised...

Shaq filed for divorce. Man I don't care what she did...have you seen Shaunie O'Neal? She's had 5 kids (4 with Shaq) and looks like THAT!?!!?!?!?!?!? Unless she shot my Momz, I'm staying with that!

If you haven't seen "Californication" on Showtime, you're missing the best new show of the summer. Duchovny is brilliant.

FOOTBALL SEASON IS HERE...THANK GOD!!!

Big shout out to my good friend in Heath, TX who told me I'd been on 'vacation' too long and to get back to writing!

one more thing: My boy runs THE best hip-hop blogsite in the south...and yes, you may see some ramblings from me there from time to time. Check the link over in my 'stuff I like' section or hit up http://www.bgdboom.blogspot.com/

and there it is...

Vacation

2007-08-31T05:15:00.000-05:00

You're reading the title and thinking: "this dude just started blogging, so why is he talking vacation?" I know, crazy ain't it?? I just mean vacation from the job...probably not from writing.

Vacation sure ain't what it used to be before being grown. I remember the whole family packing up and taking L O N G drives to visit the fam in Cali...when I lived in New Mexico. I remember going off to summer camp (no, not band camp) and making the L O N G drive from NM to Oklahoma. I remember the last time my brother and I spent our summer break in Cali and took the L O N G train ride (btw-Amtrak ain't a bad place to meet girls...what, I'm just sayin)...

now I've got a vacation coming up from my job. 5 days off...and I ain't goin nowhere! Of course, the fact that you're on vacation doesn't exactly equate to travelling. When you work the kind of job that I do when you average 50 hours a week, and work nights...a vacation is simply 3 nights sleeping in your own bed...IN A ROW!!!

man, I'm stoked about that!!!

and there it is...

I'm a blogger...sweet! ummm, now what...

2007-08-29T19:38:00.000-05:00

What sort of introduction is appropriate to my own personal blogroll?

"Hey, I've got a new blog and I hope you like it!!!" Nah, that ain't me

"Please visit my blogsite once in awhile and tell me what you think." Nope, getting colder

"I've been a fan of other blogs, I just knew it was time to start my own..." Oh, hell naw!

It's like this: I like to think, and I like to write. Sometimes what I write will actually match up with what I was thinking. Other times there might be some straight gibberish here. But that's me. I'm the Jekyl & Hyde type, clever and composed...becoming obnoxious and well, just stupid. I might go on this profound diatribe about some society ill, and somewhere near the end of the paragraph write about some hot girl walking by the window...and JUST MESS THE WHOLE THING UP! Yeah, that's me. Either way, there will be plenty of brutal honesty somewhere in the mix.

In all honesty: I was standing on the side of a busy street just watching traffic fly by, and enjoying the few sprinkles that were falling from the sky and I thought: "I've probably got a lot of good junk that I could write about. See, we've already got a problem because that wasn't really "all honesty". Why was I standing on the side of a busy street? Because my dumba## ran out of gas, and I was waiting for roadside assistance! I couldn't even get mad, since I knew I was broke and I was pushing it trying to drive the 30 miles to work with the needle BELOW the 'E'. Yeah, go ahead and say it: "DUMBA**!"

In summary:

sports--whatever
music--whatever
current events--whatever
work--whatever
politics--rarely...but, whatever

I think you get the point...it's whatever, really.

Oh, and the Jena 6 situation in Louisiana is some straight bulls***.

And I have been an Atlanta Falcons fan since 1994. Yes, I'm a Michael Vick fan...still. But we'll address that another time.